I am not sure what kind of mood but not a happy go lucky mood.
Peter left on Tuesday afternoon for Houston and was supposed to return Wednesday night. He is just now sitting at the airport in Houston waiting to come home. It has been a long week. The kids have been good and I have been able to control my temper and patience quite well. I feel like I have been blessed with extra strength. But, I am ready for my other half to help pick up the extra bits and pieces.
I am also tired of budgeting so tightly. I feel grateful that we are able to provide for our needs but lately it seems that we are just barely able to do this. Surgeries and a crown for my tooth do not help! I would love it if the day Peter gets paid his paycheck would not disappear within a matter of hours. Between tithing, fast offerings, credit cards- this is where 95% of our monthly bills go like insurance, utilities etc., groceries money for the next two weeks and our various cash saving envelopes (ie: Christmas, birthdays, travel, medicine) there is not much left. Somehow today this has me discouraged.
There are several things about my job that are irritating me right now and I sent a not so nice email to a very nice person about that which makes me mad at myself for venting to someone who did not deserve it!
And try as I might I can not forget that I had planned and looked forward to having a baby this weekend. My due date was May 11th but I had Lily early and that would have been the case again so this was the weekend I had anticipated it. I do have peace in my heart but there is a longing there too. I know Heavenly Father has a plan for me and that He loves me and is aware of me and my family.
All right, I have expressed my frustrations and I will now stop dwelling on them. I will look forward with hope and a knowledge that things will get better and that I am lucky because things could be so much worse.
I hope you have a fabulous day! I will get to hug and kiss my husband today and that is wonderful!
2 comments:
Shellie,
You are not alone! I often feel the same way, especially lately as Ryan and/or I have been out of town more often than in lately. My heart goes out to you as you face this weekend and hope that you can find some joy in the midst of your sadness. I am glad your other half is returning home to you and fully understand God's plan for there to be TWO parents, because let's face it, parenting (and all that goes with) it is HARD. Call me anytime you are feeling down and we can vent together! Or find something to do ton get out of the house. Hang in there! You're amazing, don't forget it!
I am sorry you are feeling so down today Shell. Know we love ya'll and I hope tomorrow is a better day.
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