I have a friend that has told me that all parents will have that child that will test them to the max. If you tell them not to pierce or tattoo themselves when they are teenagers they will end up with a tattoo or piercings. This is not news to me. I can think of many families where that child is visible to anyone that knows the family. I believe that even in those families that don't have an obvious "difficult child" there is one. They question their parents a little more and push the boundaries as far and as often as they can. Parents don't love these children any less in fact the love for these children is hard earned and deep rooted due to many experiences.
Right now we have 3 children and each of them has a distinct and wonderful personality. I am grateful for each one of them. Each child's way of viewing life and living it is teaching me something new as a parent. I have a child that will listen to the rule and then test me to make sure I really meant that this was a rule and that indeed their will be a consequence that is enforced. It makes me think more about exactly what rules matter and what threats, I mean consequences I am willing to carry out. I have also found that consequences differ with each child for the same rule because what matters to each is different.
Today we had a trying experience with one of my children and Peter. Peter was the one to endure the challenge longer than me. I reminded Peter to be patient and use positive encouragement because this child, though regularly trying, responds best to the positive. So, as I was leaving the situation I thought about what we are and will face with this child and had the thought that there will be plenty of people in this world quick to criticize my child. I also realized that I will at times be my child's critic and hopeful the best critic. Children will need correction and direction in their lives and that is best given with love. So, who better to give it then their parents who love them more than anyone else. I will also find myself being my child's champion. I need to defend, uplift, encourage, praise and patiently guide my children through their lives. Parenting is not for the weak of heart. I also am not foolish enough to believe that I will be a perfect parent or always know the answers. I am beyond grateful that my parents are still alive for me to turn to if I have questions. But I am even more grateful that I know I can turn to my Heavenly Father who is the perfect parent and ask for guidance and direction anytime. He loves each one of us for our individual needs, desires, challenges, obedience and even our disobedience. He loved us enough to give up His only Son to given us every chance to become all that He knows that we can become.
I love my children and what they are teaching me. I look forward to the arrival of another sweet baby, knowing that she too will come with her ups and downs. I also that I can use her arrival and the changes it will bring to our family to help me become a better mother to my other 3. I am also very grateful to have Peter by my side. We help each other remember what really matters and support each other in the discipline of our children.
So tomorrow morning when I face a new day filled with endless possibilities, I pray that I may look for the opportunities to be my child's champion and critic if needed. Above all I hope I can do it with love and patience in my heart and mouth.
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